Tough week. Back and elbow issues continue. Pain is so old. I have a high tolerance for it but it grinds me down and wears me out. Trying to balance being driven and training smart. Sleep would be so huge.

WEEKLY BULLET POINTS:

  • MONDAY – WEDNESDAY: 3 to 4 hours sleep on average. Trying to go back to sleep on waking at 3 – 4 am. Back has been a major pain with a pinched nerve / spasm right below my fusion. Temporary, not worried. I hate to admit this here but loneliness is a big factor in the depression and the pills aren’t helping much at all despite moving to the full dose two days ago. I’m sure the PD is an issue with anyone thinking of entering a relationship with me. Resigned to flying solo for now and trying to cope with the idea that this is how it will be for a long time, quite possibly for good. As usual, I put this out there as a cautionary tale. Early in diagnosis, you may be tempted to “save your loved ones” and be a martyr or think you should look for something better. There is nothing better…stay.
  • THURSDAY – FRIDAY: I’ll be damned, 6 hours of sleep two days in a row and my back is on the mend. Tremor is pretty active, however, in the right hand and some leg spasms (the creepy crawlies I call them). Looking up footage of Michael J. Fox and Muhammad Ali for my next video. Now I’ve got some disturbing images to get out of my head, but it’s ok, I’m in the fight to not go there.
  • SATURDAY: Up late last night with restless legs. This might actually be some early dyskinesia (involuntary muscle movements). I’ve added another show to my schedule, but this is just a small Strongman show just to help my gym owner Ron out. Three weeks away from Axle/Tire Squats, Last Man Standing Tire Deadlift, and Log Press for Reps. The only goal is to no get injured as the back and elbow are healing nicely.
  • SUNDAY: Another night with 6 hours of sleep! Back and elbow are both feeling better, I’m now hopeful that therapy can work so I want to give it more time. It sounds counter-intuitive, but I’m going to ask for another month off in the hopes that it can heal fully rather than just going back to work and toughing it out until it blows up.

I’m going to call this a good week. I’m adjusting to the things that I can’t change right now and despite the start of the new dyskinesia symptoms in the legs, I AM sleeping better and finally starting to heal. Tough times don’t last tough people do. Going back to my pre-week summary and comparing it to my week-end summary… yeah, this was a great week!